The holidays are here again! Twice a year, my nephews and nieces from Penang will visit their Atok and Nenek and Mak Long.
I always look forward to these visits, but honestly, after a few hours, I would have to put on a shield to survive, which is turning on a deaf ear when one child screams to another and holding back when a parent scolds a child. And a blind eye when the house starts to resemble a shipwreck. Cooking and washing will increase a few folds, the tv, cd player and computer will be surrendered to keep the kids entertained.
My brain cells had a good crack to find that cuti-cuti Malaysia spot that’s not too far from KL that will provide precious bonding opportunity with the young ones. Am I complaining? Hell, yes! But at the same time, they give me a good excuse to skip work for a few days. Me smiling.
Tuesday, May 29, 2007
Monday, May 28, 2007
Write a will today
Amanah Raya Berhad is having a promotion on will writing now until 30th August 2007. It now only costs RM150 to write a will (usual RM350). No extra charge for rewrites later and free safekeeping for life. Hurry to your nearest ARB branch, or you could register your interest with me as I am an authorized agent of ARB.
In your will, other than the distribution of your estate (less debts), pay attention to:
1. Appointment of ARB as the wasi/administrator of your estate.
2. The guardian of your underaged children.
3. Your favourite charity should you want to generate eternal pahala.
ARB staff will guide you on faraid distribution and probate matters. You could also contact me for clarification.
In your will, other than the distribution of your estate (less debts), pay attention to:
1. Appointment of ARB as the wasi/administrator of your estate.
2. The guardian of your underaged children.
3. Your favourite charity should you want to generate eternal pahala.
ARB staff will guide you on faraid distribution and probate matters. You could also contact me for clarification.
The grass is not always greener the other side of the longkang
I used to envy a friend.
Today, I sit in her living room, in a grand house, in a posh area. I see that she has some white hair now, but her complexion is as fine as a twenty-year old. We talk about the inconveniences of growing older, but agree that age has somewhat made us see things more clearly, i.e wiser. In passing, she mentions something about her “polygamous” husband. That’s new; in the past she has never mentioned him like that, just “my husband”, even though she is in fact wife no. 2. And then, she confesses, yes her husband has taken a new wife. And she is heartbroken. Who wouldn’t? For many days and nights, she struggles to find acceptance, to have “redha”.
She says, One day, my daughter (8 years old) came to me and asked, Mommy, do you regret marrying daddy? She waited for my answer, I just couldn’t respond, my heart was heavy with sadness. And then she asked again, Mommy, do you regret having me? Then, it hit me. I realize the marriage had not been all futile. It takes my innocent daughter to make me realize something good did come out of the marriage.
Tears well up in my friends eyes. Embak, always the emotional, cry along. I am learning to cope with this trial, she continues. My children are very supportive and understanding. I read books about women in Arabia and how they cope with polygamy. And I turn to Allah most of all.
It is heartbreaking for a wife when her husband takes a new wife irregardless what th wife she is. Another friend of mine who is a third wife fell into depression when her husband took wife number 4.
I guess a rich polygamist will always strive to fulfill his quota.
I am no longer envious.
Today, I sit in her living room, in a grand house, in a posh area. I see that she has some white hair now, but her complexion is as fine as a twenty-year old. We talk about the inconveniences of growing older, but agree that age has somewhat made us see things more clearly, i.e wiser. In passing, she mentions something about her “polygamous” husband. That’s new; in the past she has never mentioned him like that, just “my husband”, even though she is in fact wife no. 2. And then, she confesses, yes her husband has taken a new wife. And she is heartbroken. Who wouldn’t? For many days and nights, she struggles to find acceptance, to have “redha”.
She says, One day, my daughter (8 years old) came to me and asked, Mommy, do you regret marrying daddy? She waited for my answer, I just couldn’t respond, my heart was heavy with sadness. And then she asked again, Mommy, do you regret having me? Then, it hit me. I realize the marriage had not been all futile. It takes my innocent daughter to make me realize something good did come out of the marriage.
Tears well up in my friends eyes. Embak, always the emotional, cry along. I am learning to cope with this trial, she continues. My children are very supportive and understanding. I read books about women in Arabia and how they cope with polygamy. And I turn to Allah most of all.
It is heartbreaking for a wife when her husband takes a new wife irregardless what th wife she is. Another friend of mine who is a third wife fell into depression when her husband took wife number 4.
I guess a rich polygamist will always strive to fulfill his quota.
I am no longer envious.
Tuesday, May 15, 2007
Excuse Me
I have not blogged for 2 weeks now - last week I was couped in a hotel for 5 days (actually 3 and half , because we had field trips on the remaining days). My mind was focused on learning, and meeting new people. So that's my excuse. Heck, I can't even convince myself that is a good one.
Really, I do not have much to say; my life is that flat. Perhaps you could go to these blogs for the time being. I peruse this daily,
http://www.rickey.org/ for the latest on Sanjaya Malakar and other AI contestants, and this, weekly:
http://blog.360.yahoo.com/blog-bSgka9MjerQP1V1Jo45o
for beautiful prose to wind down over the weekend. Deli, the latter is actually your blog. To the other 3 readers, you should visit Deli's blog. This poet had people in tears last Saturday when he recited his poems before them.
My current read: E. Annie Proulx's Shipping News (which I pick after watching Brokeback Mountain and reading Ms Proulx's short story of the same title).
Really, I do not have much to say; my life is that flat. Perhaps you could go to these blogs for the time being. I peruse this daily,
http://www.rickey.org/ for the latest on Sanjaya Malakar and other AI contestants, and this, weekly:
http://blog.360.yahoo.com/blog-bSgka9MjerQP1V1Jo45o
for beautiful prose to wind down over the weekend. Deli, the latter is actually your blog. To the other 3 readers, you should visit Deli's blog. This poet had people in tears last Saturday when he recited his poems before them.
My current read: E. Annie Proulx's Shipping News (which I pick after watching Brokeback Mountain and reading Ms Proulx's short story of the same title).
Tuesday, May 01, 2007
Lets not be idle
Wah, what a long break we are having; it’s a week off work if one takes Friday and Monday as leaves. Since I am without agenda this time, my yesterday and today were spent on watching and re-watching Robert Altman’s Gosford Park VCD, which I bought during a trip in Hong Kong 4 years ago which by the way, I still do not know whether legal or pirated. The packaging and the VCD's quality are convincingly original but it cost me equiv RM10 only, - what da ya think? It was a title that I was looking hi and lo for in Malaysia at that time, so when I saw it in Hong Kong, I grabbed it. But the Chinese sub-titles irk me every time.
I have actually watched this video twice before, but this time, with surplus free time, I looked up the internet to research the movie. I joined the discussion board on IMDB website, looked up for Ebert’s review and downloaded the script to make sense what the mostly British cast are saying.
It’s a story set in 1930’s that takes place over 1 week or so at a grand manor in the English countryside with a murder thrown in, in the middle of the story. The cast is comprised of two sets of people; the upstairs people i.e. the aristocrats and the guests, and the downstairs people i.e. the servants. I don’t know how to summarize the storyline, because there are so many characters and sub-stories, so I just say this. It’s a movie that you cannot blink, because you chance to miss a gesture. Many times I have to press the replay button to see what all the characters in that frame are doing. All in all, it is a very well made movie.
Do you know that the Americans and the British have different pronunciation for the word “valet”?
Ah, I also stumbled upon this website http://www.gutenberg.org/ which hosts millions of e-books that you can download for FREE. And Frank McCourt’s favourite author P.G.Wodehouse’s works are listed. Yay! I know I’ll be as busy as a bee tomorrow.
I have actually watched this video twice before, but this time, with surplus free time, I looked up the internet to research the movie. I joined the discussion board on IMDB website, looked up for Ebert’s review and downloaded the script to make sense what the mostly British cast are saying.
It’s a story set in 1930’s that takes place over 1 week or so at a grand manor in the English countryside with a murder thrown in, in the middle of the story. The cast is comprised of two sets of people; the upstairs people i.e. the aristocrats and the guests, and the downstairs people i.e. the servants. I don’t know how to summarize the storyline, because there are so many characters and sub-stories, so I just say this. It’s a movie that you cannot blink, because you chance to miss a gesture. Many times I have to press the replay button to see what all the characters in that frame are doing. All in all, it is a very well made movie.
Do you know that the Americans and the British have different pronunciation for the word “valet”?
Ah, I also stumbled upon this website http://www.gutenberg.org/ which hosts millions of e-books that you can download for FREE. And Frank McCourt’s favourite author P.G.Wodehouse’s works are listed. Yay! I know I’ll be as busy as a bee tomorrow.
Monday, April 23, 2007
Soul Nourishment
Setiap hari Ahad, insyaAllah Embak mengaji Aqidah di Persatuan al Hunafa di Taman Tun. Kelas ini dibimbing oleh seorang lecturer in Islamic Thoughts di UIA. Ustaz ini berasal dari Uganda dan telah menetap di Malaysia 12 tahun. Muda lagi orangnya, awal 30an dan berkahwin dengan muslimah Aceh dan mereka mempunyai 3 orang anak.
Embak suka cara dia mengajar, (he speaks 12 languages!) sebab lain dari ustaz-ustaz yang biasa Embak tengok di tv atau dengar di masjid/surau. Adik Embak yang bongsu kata, style ustaz ni ialah salafi, iaitu berasaskan hadis dan alQuran. Dan yang istimewanya kelas di al Hunafa diikuti oleh berbilang bangsa yang baru memeluk Islam dan lama/lahir sedia Islam.
Baru-baru ini Ustaz memulakan topik baru iaitu pengenalan terhadap Sunnah, yang mana pada minggu-minggu mendatang akan membawa kepada topik Bid'ah. Sebagai mukadimah, ustaz memberi beberapa contoh hadith salah yang telah digunapakai sehingga mendatangkan bid'ah.
Pernah tak dengar orang cakap, "Bukan dari umat Nabi kalau tak berkahwin"? Satu lagi, "kalau anak tu anak luar nikah, tujuh keturunannya tak masuk syurga"? Embak pernah.
Kedua-duanya tak betul. Yang pertama tuh, Uztaz kata ada imam terkenal (kalau tak silap Imam Nawawi) yang tak berkahwin kerana sibuk dengan ilmiah. Kalau betul Nabi ada cakap sedemikian, tentulah Imam tu akan berusaha kahwin, ya tak?
Yang kedua tu, bercanggah dengan ayat dalam alQuran (tak catit pulak ayatnya). In essence, ayat tu menyatakan, untuk setiap individu setiap amalan yang dibuatnya, dan dia tak akan disoal mengenai amalan orang-orang lain.
Bercakap mengenai kahwin, ustaz kata ianya boleh jadi wajib, harus, makruh, dan haram. Makruh, kalau si suami berkahwin dengan harapan menumpang gaji isteri, haram kalau dia akan memudaratkan isteri.
Banyak pelajaran Embak dapat dari kelas-kelas Ustaz ni. Yang mengobat hati dan menjadi pedoman, dan banyak benda yang dah lupa diingatkan balik. Embak banyak terimakasih pada kawan Embak yang mengajak hadiri kelas ni, walau pada mulanya Embak keberatan. Alhamdulillah, sebab beri Embak kekawan yang baik-baik.
Embak suka cara dia mengajar, (he speaks 12 languages!) sebab lain dari ustaz-ustaz yang biasa Embak tengok di tv atau dengar di masjid/surau. Adik Embak yang bongsu kata, style ustaz ni ialah salafi, iaitu berasaskan hadis dan alQuran. Dan yang istimewanya kelas di al Hunafa diikuti oleh berbilang bangsa yang baru memeluk Islam dan lama/lahir sedia Islam.
Baru-baru ini Ustaz memulakan topik baru iaitu pengenalan terhadap Sunnah, yang mana pada minggu-minggu mendatang akan membawa kepada topik Bid'ah. Sebagai mukadimah, ustaz memberi beberapa contoh hadith salah yang telah digunapakai sehingga mendatangkan bid'ah.
Pernah tak dengar orang cakap, "Bukan dari umat Nabi kalau tak berkahwin"? Satu lagi, "kalau anak tu anak luar nikah, tujuh keturunannya tak masuk syurga"? Embak pernah.
Kedua-duanya tak betul. Yang pertama tuh, Uztaz kata ada imam terkenal (kalau tak silap Imam Nawawi) yang tak berkahwin kerana sibuk dengan ilmiah. Kalau betul Nabi ada cakap sedemikian, tentulah Imam tu akan berusaha kahwin, ya tak?
Yang kedua tu, bercanggah dengan ayat dalam alQuran (tak catit pulak ayatnya). In essence, ayat tu menyatakan, untuk setiap individu setiap amalan yang dibuatnya, dan dia tak akan disoal mengenai amalan orang-orang lain.
Bercakap mengenai kahwin, ustaz kata ianya boleh jadi wajib, harus, makruh, dan haram. Makruh, kalau si suami berkahwin dengan harapan menumpang gaji isteri, haram kalau dia akan memudaratkan isteri.
Banyak pelajaran Embak dapat dari kelas-kelas Ustaz ni. Yang mengobat hati dan menjadi pedoman, dan banyak benda yang dah lupa diingatkan balik. Embak banyak terimakasih pada kawan Embak yang mengajak hadiri kelas ni, walau pada mulanya Embak keberatan. Alhamdulillah, sebab beri Embak kekawan yang baik-baik.
Sunday, April 01, 2007
Pet Names
Semasa Embak kecil, emak dan abah selalu menggelar Embak “si Tua”. Nama tu digunakan sesama mereka, seingat Embak tak pulak dipakai apabila bercakap dengan Embak. Contohnya, "Si Tua mana?" - And I would just cringe in the background- Memanglah Embak anak sulong, tapi Embak sangatlah tak suka nama tu, MACAM lah kita ni tua sangat! Lamanya juga perap perasaan geram, hinggalah ke usia duapuluhan, barulahEmbak terfikir yang sebenarnya si Tua tu nama timangan, nama yang diberi dengan rasa kasih, bukan untuk mengejek. Nasib baiklah namatu tak lagi mereka pakai sekarang ni, kalau tidak akan terus menjeruklah Embak .
Apa lagi gelaran yang mereka beri ya pada adik-beradik Embak yang lain? Kalau tak silap:
Untuk Angah - Si Cembeng (kuat melalak)
Untuk Ateh - Si Raja (kuat perintah)
Untuk Alang - Tak ingat, tapi yang ini lambat bercakap
Untuk Cik, Uda, Atam dan Acu - ish, tak ingat lah. Tak ada kut! Agaknya selepas tiga anak, emak dan abah saya dah malas nak menggelar anak-anak mereka.
Masa emak dan abah muda-muda dulu, emak panggil abah "dia" (sebutan macam "dear" je kan?). Contohnya, emak akan tanya, "Pukul berapa dia balik nanti?". Dan abah akan jawab, "Abang balik pukul 4. Nanti Nah siap-siaplah". Tapi sekarang, sejak emak sakit, emak akan cakap, "Abah ye balik pukul berapa?" Abah jawab, " Aye balik pukul 4. Nanti Ayang siap-siaplah."
Embak gembira mereka lebih mesra di usia emas. Dulu tak perasan pun mereka berkasih sayang, mungkin sibuk membesarkan anak-anak.
Apa lagi gelaran yang mereka beri ya pada adik-beradik Embak yang lain? Kalau tak silap:
Untuk Angah - Si Cembeng (kuat melalak)
Untuk Ateh - Si Raja (kuat perintah)
Untuk Alang - Tak ingat, tapi yang ini lambat bercakap
Untuk Cik, Uda, Atam dan Acu - ish, tak ingat lah. Tak ada kut! Agaknya selepas tiga anak, emak dan abah saya dah malas nak menggelar anak-anak mereka.
Masa emak dan abah muda-muda dulu, emak panggil abah "dia" (sebutan macam "dear" je kan?). Contohnya, emak akan tanya, "Pukul berapa dia balik nanti?". Dan abah akan jawab, "Abang balik pukul 4. Nanti Nah siap-siaplah". Tapi sekarang, sejak emak sakit, emak akan cakap, "Abah ye balik pukul berapa?" Abah jawab, " Aye balik pukul 4. Nanti Ayang siap-siaplah."
Embak gembira mereka lebih mesra di usia emas. Dulu tak perasan pun mereka berkasih sayang, mungkin sibuk membesarkan anak-anak.
Wednesday, March 28, 2007
Dah beli!
Berita terkini. Kepada 4 orang pembaca blog ini, sekiranya anda berkira-kira hendak belikan Embak buku Teacher Man karangan Frank McCourt, Embak nak maklumkan, Saya dah beli.
Semalam, Embak pergi ke MPH, nak cuba dapatkan diskaun 15% sempena besday Embak(salah satu manafat keahlian MPH Readers' Circle) walaupun besday Embak dah 3 minggu berlalu. Petugas di MPH berkata Maaf Puan, diskaun 15% tu hanya untuk tempoh seminggu dari tarikh lahir. Tapi berita baik Puan, esok kami akan adakan Sale, yang diskaunnya 20%. Woopee!
Maka Embak datang balik hari ni dan membelanjakan diri Embak dengan 3 buku. Jualan murah MPH akan berakhir 1 April. Jika anda bukan ahli MPH Readers' Circle, diskaun 15% sahaja. Pergilah beli buku, nanti boleh dapat potongan dari cukai pendapatan.
Semalam, Embak pergi ke MPH, nak cuba dapatkan diskaun 15% sempena besday Embak(salah satu manafat keahlian MPH Readers' Circle) walaupun besday Embak dah 3 minggu berlalu. Petugas di MPH berkata Maaf Puan, diskaun 15% tu hanya untuk tempoh seminggu dari tarikh lahir. Tapi berita baik Puan, esok kami akan adakan Sale, yang diskaunnya 20%. Woopee!
Maka Embak datang balik hari ni dan membelanjakan diri Embak dengan 3 buku. Jualan murah MPH akan berakhir 1 April. Jika anda bukan ahli MPH Readers' Circle, diskaun 15% sahaja. Pergilah beli buku, nanti boleh dapat potongan dari cukai pendapatan.
Tuesday, March 27, 2007
Wajah
Semalam Embak berjumpa dengan kawan Embak di kliniknya, yang juga menawarkan perkhidmatan kecantikan. Di ruang menunggu, Embak lihat dua orang wanita yang bertudung, yang sorang tu teramatlah putih bersih kulitnya, dan dalam kategori jelita. Dari perbualan mereka, Embak dapati yang mereka ini tidak asing dengan suntikan kolagen, vitamin-C, botox dan seumpanya. Terkejutlah Embak. Selama ini Embak ingat yang mengamalkan bantuan-bantuan kecantikan begini adalah dari kalangan artis-artis dan orang-orang yang, iyalah, trendy, sofisticated, fashion-conscious, glamour-seeking rich tai-tais.
Rupa-rupanya, semua lapisan dah mengamalkan gaya hidup suntikan ini. Patutlah klinik kawan Embak ni berdaya maju gayanya. Embak di sana atas urusan kerja, tak tahulah esok-esok pulak. Minta-minta kat Allah, tulang pipi Embak yang orang selalu kata tiruan ni, maintain. Takutnya hari ni kata tak nak, esok-esok bila dah kendur, pucat, kata nak pulak!
Rupa-rupanya, semua lapisan dah mengamalkan gaya hidup suntikan ini. Patutlah klinik kawan Embak ni berdaya maju gayanya. Embak di sana atas urusan kerja, tak tahulah esok-esok pulak. Minta-minta kat Allah, tulang pipi Embak yang orang selalu kata tiruan ni, maintain. Takutnya hari ni kata tak nak, esok-esok bila dah kendur, pucat, kata nak pulak!
Monday, March 19, 2007
A reminder for me
This is one of Angela McCourts's favourite songs, and one of two songs sung by her sons and grandsons at her funeral:
A mother's love is a blessing
No matter where you roam,
Keep her while she's living,
You'll miss her when she's gone.
A mother's love is a blessing
No matter where you roam,
Keep her while she's living,
You'll miss her when she's gone.
Frank McCourt - My new favourite writer
I have seen his book,“Angela’s Ashes” many times at MPH warehouse sales, but because the cover is a dreary photo of a dirty boy, I never had the incentive to pick it up. I saw the book again at PayLess Books warehouse sale, a hardcover selling for RM8. Upclose, I read that the book is a Pulitzer prize winner. Because it was so cheap and apparently good enough to merit a Pulitzer, I bought it. It is about Frank McCourt’s stories of growing up in Brooklyn, and then Ireland.
I only got around to reading it last month; the book overwhelms me with images of hardcore poverty and hopelessness. I have never understood what being poor means before; it's so well written, that TV3’s Bersama Mu pales in comparison. To Frank and his brothers, an egg was a luxury, jam jars served as cups, and most of the time their once a day meal consisted of cold, weak tea. Their mother survived on beggary because the father was a hopeless drunkard. But the book is not all about despair; there are many places in the book where I laugh hard. McCourt managed to find hilarity amidst his family's misery. Truly deserving the Pulitzer.
Soon after I finished "Angela’s Ashes", I found “‘Tis”, the sequel to “Angela’s Ashes”, at the Big Bookshop warehouse sale (yes, I am fond of books warehouse sales!), which is still going on at Atria until 24th March. Very lucky find indeed as it was the only copy left. I finished this book too.
I am now looking for “Teacher Man”, which is the last of the memoir trilogy. Not too late to get me one as a belated birthday present. Hint, hint.
I only got around to reading it last month; the book overwhelms me with images of hardcore poverty and hopelessness. I have never understood what being poor means before; it's so well written, that TV3’s Bersama Mu pales in comparison. To Frank and his brothers, an egg was a luxury, jam jars served as cups, and most of the time their once a day meal consisted of cold, weak tea. Their mother survived on beggary because the father was a hopeless drunkard. But the book is not all about despair; there are many places in the book where I laugh hard. McCourt managed to find hilarity amidst his family's misery. Truly deserving the Pulitzer.
Soon after I finished "Angela’s Ashes", I found “‘Tis”, the sequel to “Angela’s Ashes”, at the Big Bookshop warehouse sale (yes, I am fond of books warehouse sales!), which is still going on at Atria until 24th March. Very lucky find indeed as it was the only copy left. I finished this book too.
I am now looking for “Teacher Man”, which is the last of the memoir trilogy. Not too late to get me one as a belated birthday present. Hint, hint.
Sunday, March 04, 2007
Nohara Sinchan
Embak dan Maisara berebut patung Sinchan semalam. Mak dia belikan sebagai hadiah harijadi Embak, tapi dah dipeluk-peluknya si Mai, Embak pun mengalah. Hari ni Embak masuk bilik, tengok Sinchan dah ada atas katil Embak, hee hee. My first stuffed toy ever!
Dulu-dulu, Embak tak faham betul kenapalah adik Embak suka sangat tengok katun Jepun nih. Sekarang, Embak pulak dah tersangkut. Walhal, anak-anak menakan Embak ramai yang tak dapat tengok program ni - dah di "ban" oleh emak bapak mereka.
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